Some of you have been asking for an update...and since I should really be doing homework, but I really don't want to, here's a small glimpse into my life.  (This one is for you, Kevin.  Hope you're listening to a sweet Better Than Ezra tune while you read this.)

A few weekends ago, I went home to visit an old friend.  We were on our way to a wedding for his friends when a semi-truck carrying a dump trailor lost its axle on the interstate.  His breaks locked and we couldn't stop, as the axle came flying up at us.  We hit the car in front of us and then went off the road.  Even after sitting there for forty-five minutes waiting on a police report to be filed that included all seven or eight vehicles involved and the two semis, we still made it to the wedding on time.  Not a scratch to show for it.  God is so sovereign.

Last weekend, I was home again as a college leader for a DiscipleNow, working with senior girls.  Saturday afternoon, everyone took part in a scavenger hunt that was set up like the Amazing Race.  The first challenge was like Fear Factor, where everyone had to pick something disgusting out of a bag and eat it until they were finished or throwing up.  Then they were given their next clue, and so on.  Some of them were silly, some fun, some hard, some disgusting.  But with each clue they were given a piece of a puzzle which turned out to be a map where x marked the spot of the buried treasure at the end.  At first, I kept thinking: "What eternal spiritual significance does this have?  I'd much rather take a nap."  But then, it hit me...that was the MOST spiritual thing we did all weekend.  I mean, isn't the Christian life like that?  We don't know what the next challenge is..just this one.  We get them piece by piece.  Some challenges aren't that hard.  Some are disgusting, exhausting, and frustrating.  Some are extremely fun.  But no matter what the challenges are, each time we are given the next piece, we understand a little clearer how exactly it fits together with everything else we've ever done.  And in the end, there is always that treasure that we are working towards.  And I was encouraged and challenged to get dirty, have fun, enjoy each step of the way, no matter how hard it is, because that's the beauty of life.

Every Thursday, the weekly news paper comes out in my home town.  My mom called Thursday night to say that she was almost certain she had read something about me.  Turns out, a girl I used to babysit entered an essay into a contest about role models, and she chose to write about me.  The essay won fourth place.  It is a really sweet essay, but very humbling to know that someone actually hangs on every word you say, and thinks you have it all together--especially when you don't have a clue what to do or where to go next.  When you least expect it, they're watching.

This is my last extended vacation to be at home before I graduate since I'm planning a trip away for Spring Break, so I know I should enjoy every minute of it.  Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely grateful for a break from school.  Academia is a gruelling world with its own heavy demands. 

Being 'home' is so different for me this time around.  I've been very introspective the past few days, especially.  The sad reality of it is that my world and relationships, and my understanding of both, are changing faster than I would like for them to.  I went to watch a dear friend of mine graduate from college this weekend--a friend who has been a spiritual anchor in my life since I was in highschool.  Afterwards, he moved back home...to another state, and joined the ranks of many of my other hard-working college graduate friends.  For some of my friends, this is their last 'single' Christmas, and it's weird. 

When I was a child, I remember going to weddings with my parents and thinking that there must be an age when all of a sudden people were old enough to get married and begin a family or have a career.  Now that my friends are starting to do these things, and soon I will have to follow suit with a job of my own, I realize that this arbitrary age of feeling 'grown up' doesn't exist.  Life is always going to be an unknown, even when we know.  And I am disappointed in the realization that life isn't the way I used to believe it was.  I don't know what's next for me--not even the slightest clue--and I'm okay with that...most days.  But this growing up is not as fun as it seems.  I've been trying to catch up with old friends whom I have always adored, finding that we now have very little to say to each other these days.  Life has been so different for each of us, good, bad, or indifferent.  We have all changed, and it seems we barely recognize each other as a result. 

But I rest in knowing that Jesus Christ, the one in whom I place my trust, the one I serve, is the same yesterday, today and forever.  And He knows the plans he has for me, plans to prosper me.  Not to harm me.  And so I trust, though sometimes it's the hardest thing.  And I praise Him for the chance to experience even the realizations like these.  Because, in the words of my friend Brooke Upton, "how can we grow without rain?"